Sushi and Tempura Night

July 23, 2010 § 1 Comment

Know what the worst feeling a cook can get?

If someone YAKs at your food.

Yup, that’s the disclaimer for today’s post: I may or may not have given someone food poisoning. There’s a first time for everything! Sure, I’ve made some terrible shit before, like the time I decided to swap out balsamic vinegar for distilled white vinegar in a pie recipe, or the time I literally microwaved a Pop-Tart into ashes, but I’ve never before made someone SICK before.

In my defense though, it was an ambitious undertaking: sushi. It’s inherently dangerous! I took all the right precautions! I went out and bought all sushi grade fish…which is a bajillion times more expensive than regular fish, and so I tortured the fishmonger with demands like “Can I have .0000123 pounds of the salmon? And exactly four shrimp?” Fishmonger: “Are you on a super crazy diet or something?” Me: “Does it LOOK like I need to be on a diet?!?” (poor thing, it was his first day too…) I cleaned my knife between cutting each different type of fish. I washed my hands obsessively. I have no clue what I did wrong! So, follow my recipe AATTTT YYOUUUURRR OWWNN RISKKKK…(but it tasted damn good, if I can toot my own horn.) (As a saying, that doesn’t make sense to me…)

Rainbow Roll
makes 5 rolls | serves 3-4 | prep time: 30 minutes | cook time: 1 hour
A rainbow roll is basically different types of raw fish and avocado layered over a California roll innards. Think of it as a California roll snake with blankets of fish just hanging out on top.  This recipe has enough rice to make 5 rolls, but I didn’t know that, so I made 4 rolls and so they had so much rice that when I cut them up, each slice was the size of my palm. Don’t do that with yours.

for the rice
– 3 cups (rice cups, which is like 3/4 of a regular cup, so that would be 2 1/4 real cups) of sushi rice (Japanese medium grain)
– 1/3 cup seasoned rice vinegar (the back of the Nishiki rice bag says 2/3 cups, but they are WRONG, unless you like drinking vinegar)
– 4 cups (rice cups) water

for the California roll part
– 4 imitation crab sticks, ripped up
– 2 ripe avocados, cut into slices (reserve 1/2 avocado for later!)
– 1 small cucumber, cut into thin sticks
– 5 sheets of nori (seaweed paper)

for the Rainbow part
– 1/3 lb salmon. sushi grade
– 1/4 lb ahi tuna, sushi grade
– 1/4 lb halibut, sushi grade

1. Cook the rice with the water in your rice cooker. If you lack one, go get one. If you’re still lacking one, the back of your rice bag should have instructions for cooking it on the stove, or at least Google will. When the rice is ready, pour the vinegar over it and mix. Leave to cool to room temperature.
2. Lay 1 sheet of nori on a sheet of plastic wrap. Grab a large hunk of rice and spread it over the nori, but don’t pack it in too densely or you’ll end up with baseball sized sushi like I did. Flip is over so the concoction is rice side down. Place crab sticks, avocado, & cucumber sticks 1/4 of the way up, and then roll, pulling the plastic wrap away as you roll. It helps if you have a sushi mat, but if you don’t have one, don’t sweat it, it’ll just be uggo. (Double bag that, yo!)


3. Once the roll is rolled up, drape alternating slices of salmon, tuna, halibut, and avocado over the top, then place the plastic wrap over it, and give it a quick squeeze to adhere the fish to the rice. Slice it up into six equal pieces and repeat steps 1-3 four more times.

Tempura
serves 3-4 | prep time: 10 minutes | cook time: 15 minutes

Um, there are very clear instructions on the box of tempura mix. I’d love to tell you more, but it’s Friday and clearly, this blog is meant to be updated on Thursdays. Plus, I gave someone food poisoning with this recipe, why would you want it anyways?

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